Getting ready to teach one of the toughest lessons in my life on Survival:
What does Martin Luther King Jr. and The Civil Rights Movement, Hitler and the Holocaust, and Katiness Everdeen with The Hunger Games all have in common…and If I wasn’t teaching teenagers, I’d add Creflo Dollar to the mix!
Our Black Girls…
If it’s not their skin pigment, it’s their hair, or their self-awareness of what society identifies as beautiful or not. Our black girls feel that their hair is never quite long enough or their skin not quite fair enough to identify themselves as beautiful; therefore, as parents of young girls, it is imperative that we tell our young women how beautiful they are and how wonderful they are just as they are! Although, we hint or allude our thoughts to our young women, saying it regularly is a necessity that our young women should hear daily.
When is the last time, you told a young black girl that she was absolutely beautiful? If we don’t tell them and reinforce it, we can’t wait for society to step up and do it. It’s obvious that we’ll never make black beauty an important enough topic world-wide because what is viewed and accepted as beautiful in America is white. Our girls are told through movies, videos, commercials, and beauty pageants that black women have a difficult time appealing to this invisible man-made societal belief that black women aren’t in the rankings of being the Most Beautiful Women Alive! Yet we are!
Our skin tones vary in such that we fall between Praline Cream to Chocolate Velvet, but all we see is light skin and black. We have the body shape that all women from Brazilians to Irish go under the knife to achieve! We have strong dominated features that pronounce our presence in this world as Queens. Along with our outstanding attributes, we hold a strength that only we as Black women possess and can never be reproduced by any other.
All this is true, yet so very few gravitate towards the belief that they are beautiful. What is seen instead is what society has labeled as beautiful. We have been taught to undermine those features that make us beautiful in order to suppress our security and confidence. Imagine if all black women knew the secret that they are absolutely beautiful? Degrading oneself would stop, chasing men would stop, feeling insecure or needy would stop, and most of all, we’d stop looking for a man to validate or ensure that we exist because everything we need is already embedded within ourselves.
And little black girls would feel confident enough to walk around understanding that their skin is marvelous, their presence is intimidating, and that other women study their very being in an attempt to clone something that is either innate or not.
Little white girls are told they are beautiful everyday just by turning on the television or watching a movie, while our girls are rarely and scarcely ever portrayed as beautiful! So the charge for today and everyday henceforth, is to remind every black girl contacted that she is absolutely gorgeous and to be proud and confident enough to show it!
Some Wisdom to live By!
The Camera Chasers &…
Rev. Sharpton and Rev. Jessie Jackson please stop chasing the camera. Please demonstrate when lights are off and publicity is silence. If Sharpton and Jackson were providing the black community with the correct leadership and teachings while cameras were off, several of our black men and women would still be alive. I can only imagine that Sharpton and Jackson were sitting home for the last few months awaiting the next brother to be shot so that they may get their shot at fame!
We only here from these brothers when the black community is suffering rather than hearing or seeing their contributions during the calm before the storm. We can only ask our self whether or not their character is credible. It saddens me to see the black community rally behind camera chasers. Drama fuels their pockets and is the leading contributors to the success of their campaigns. Had these brothers’ hearts and fight been appropriately targeted, Ferguson, Missouri’s, police department would have been found out before the death of Michael Brown. Why did it take/why does it take a camera to wake Sharpton and Jackson up out their sleep? Where is the urgency?
Why aren’t Sharpton and Jackson sending our black brothers home from this protest and teaching them about their deposition or teaching them how to overcome incidents such as Michael Brown and Trayvon Martin? If the black community wants to win, why aren’t we being taught to be patient, fight silently with educating our mind, fight quietly so not to alert anyone to the allegiance forming amongst our people, and most of all, why aren’t they teaching our black people that the only way to win is through education! Is protesting all we can do? Can we not take our young black boys home, sit at the kitchen tables, and teach them how they will be perceived in this world and teach them how their disposition is already a threat even before they are 18 years old; therefore, they must conduct themselves in a fashion that will not only allow them to move through the system unharmed but also save their life!
Protesting is temporary and staged if nothing else! What we need is long-term influences that will not only save our people today or tomorrow but the next generation as well. Jessie and Al have the capability and enough support from the black community to not just follow the crowd but build the crowd even when no one is looking. Instead, Sharpton and Jackson look for ways to capitalize off the black community’s degeneration-rather than prevent, they persist.
The Camera Chases:
Martin Luther King Jr., Malcolm X, Medgar Evans, Elijah Muhammad, Maya Angelou, Ida Bell Wells-Barnett, and even our own president, President Barack Obama performed and perform their duties to the black community whether the lights are on or off. Cameras love them because they aren’t working for popularity. All candid shots for them! Their vision and their purpose are simple, create and ingrain in black people: confidence, pride, education, and knowledge of what being black means when growing up in a white world.
Fight when there seems there is nothing to fight about. Educate when it seems no new learning is needed. It is during these times that our influence on our young is most pertinent, not after the death, but fight and educate before the deaths occur.
Cameras chased Malcom X even when he preferred to fight in the shadows. Cameras followed Martin Luther King Jr. even when he was eating. When have we ever seen a camera chase Sharpton or Jackson? These brothers could be walking right outside the CNN news station in Washington, DC, and not receive even a glance, because not only do they play to the gallery, but even white people understand that they are hoodwinking the black community into believing they care and can actually make a difference.
Those who seek attention are seen as thirsty and hungry from starvation; Sharpton and Jackson understand that concept better than anything else; therefore, when there is a crisis in the black community, they put their shoes on and speed towards it. If their purpose was active before the shots were fired and the cameras rolled, they wouldn’t need to talk so loud, dress so pretty, or preach so much. Their works would be seen by the masses, as it has from our fallen heroes and those who continue to fight the battle with or without the cameras rolling.
Tyler Perry & His Love for Elephants
The matriarch is the eldest female cow in a herd of elephants who leads the younger cows and their calves through survival. She is usually the wisest cow and teaches the younger cows how to raise their calves and how to make decisions with food, danger, shelter, etc.
Tyler Perry’s role of Madea resembles the elephant community. Each time Perry dresses in his gray wig, knee high stockings, and grandma house coat, he becomes what black people have accepted as the crutch for majority of black families. Perry’s role of Madea is the safe haven for abused women, the decision maker, the support system, and the home is the location for families to hibernate during transitional periods, cookouts, family reunions, meetings, etc…Unfortunately, Perry deliberately made his role of Madea a widow.
How does this relate to the elephant matriarch?
Just like the eldest cow, Madea leads the herd of black people through all their decisions. When they are lost are confused it is Madea who saves them and teaches them the right way to proceed successfully.
Where are the bull-elephants or Black men in this equation?
Tyler Perry loves Elephants. Surrounded by several black women, their children, and their incapability to succeed in life without her guidance sends the message to society that black men are non-representative.
In each movie, the character of Madea saves the day, not a man. Each movie, Madea counsels, teaches, and ultimately makes the decisions for the other women.
In the elephant community a male calf is led by the matriarch until he is at least 10 years of age and able to reproduce. He relies heavenly on the Matriarch and never knows the bull that created him.
Once a bull, his job is to procreate in the elephant community and do nothing more. They go from cow-to-cow creating more calves and basically create a bachelor type herd with other bulls all awaiting mating season. They have almost zero responsibility for anything, including their calves.
What message is this sending to our youth?
Our youth adore…no simply love the humor Madea puts out through his drag appearance. But sublimely, Tyler Perry is teaching our young people that black men are unable to guide, lead, or simply be there for our black families.
Understanding that Tyler had a rough upbringing, this man has the opportunity and outlet to lift-up the black community, but instead he delivers our dirty laundry verses glorifying our good and inspiring our youth, especially our boys, to grow up and be leaders in their families.
I have seen a shift in our communities since his rise to fame. Men think it is okay to sit back and let their women take the lead, like the elephants. And our women, just as the elephants, feel it is okay to be the loudest, boldest, and most aggressive in the family when those roles should be reversed.
Tyler Perry had to study elephants before deciding to surround his acting career with the exact attributes cows, bulls, and calves exhibit in the wild.
Think About It!